6 Things I Learned from CELTA

If you were paying attention, dear readers, you’ll remember that on February 9th I posted a list of goals I was working towards this year. At the very top of that list I mentioned my desire to “successfully complete the CELTA course”. Four months later (to the day) I’m posting once again to let you know that I’ve done just that. Behold:

As much as I’d like to say “I’m awesome” and just leave it at that, the truth is that CELTA really was a great learning experience for me. I’ve even told several people that I value my time in the CELTA program more than I valued the last year of my masters education. With this in mind, I’d now like to compile a short list of lessons I’ve  learned over the past two and a half months. I’m not promising it will be groundbreaking philosophy or anything, just some helpful things I picked up along the way. And here they are…

                                                    6 Things I Learned from CELTA

(1) True Spontaneity Requires Preparation

All my life I’ve seen myself as something of a free spirit, the kind of person who refuses to be tied down by convention and who likes to head out for the horizon at a moment’s notice. I did move to Korea just three weeks after finding out about it, after all. And once, a long long time ago, I quit my job at Red Lobster so I could go to the fair with some friends. “I’m living for the moment,” I would always say. Can’t wait for tomorrow. I might not have that long. So when the idea to register for CELTA first occurred to me I assumed I would do the fashionable thing, which is to spend a month in Thailand and take the course there. But for the first time in my life I actually paused to consider what I was about to do:

“If I take the CELTA course in Thailand I’ll have to leave my job. And when the course is over I’ll probably have to go home for a while until I find something else. So I’ll be living at home with no job and very little money. I won’t even know for sure when (or if) I’ll be employed again. Hmmm…this plan doesn’t seem very workable.”

So, with a bit of research I discovered that a part-time CELTA course was available in Seoul. Took the class, never missed a day of work, and now I’m looking forward to my summer vacation in Japan, which I’ve already paid for. See? If I’d decided to “live for the moment” back in February I’d probably be sleeping on my parents’ couch right now.

(2) You Value Things More When You Pay for Them Yourself 

This is 1950s parent logic, but alas it’s true. I paid for CELTA with my own hard-earned cash (first class I’ve ever taken without a loan of some kind) and as a result I really made sure I was getting the most out of it. “Pay attention,” I reminded myself, “you’re paying for this.” 

(3) Productivity Feels Better Than Procrastination

My mom will probably have another heart attack when she hears (reads?) me saying this, but one thing I really liked about CELTA is how insanely busy it kept me. Between work and the CELTA course there was simply no time for my usual procrastination.  Papers needed to be checked. Classes needed to be planned. Lesson plans needed to be prepared. Materials needed to be printed. It was strictly go go go, and it got me into the habit of always doing something. Laundry needs to be hung up? Hang it up now. Report cards are due next week? Do them now, don’t wait until the night before. You sleep much better at night when you feel you really deserve it. 

(4) Stay Vigilant. Failure Can Come Even in the Midst of Success 

Towards the halfway mark I started getting a lot of positive feedback about my classroom performance at CELTA. The students really seemed to enjoy my lessons and the instructors were all in agreement that I was making great progress. I really felt like I had it under control. Maybe that’s why I didn’t plan properly for one of my written assignments. I ended up turning it in late and ultimately failing.  This probably ruined any chance I might have had of passing with a Pass B. Nobody’s fault but mine. But what an important lesson: it’s great when you’re doing a good job, but it’s more important to keep doing a good job. 

(5) Recognize Your Limitations – I know you’ve all seen those cheesy feel-good motivator posters that tell you to “Know your limitations, then defy them“

but that’s just more nonsense dreamed up by the “money can’t buy happiness” crowd. The truth is, we all have limitations. At some point you will get tired. Even when you’re hard at work on something, the moment will come when you start checking the clock and feeling burned out. It’s important to accept these things and make your plans accordingly. If you know 2 a.m. is the latest you can stay up and still be coherent, don’t make plans to stay up and work until 6 a.m. Doing your best work requires you to know when and how you do your best.

(6) Be Prepared for Sudden Stops

 Some of you may be wondering why I’m posting about this on June 9th when I actually finished CELTA on June 1st. Good question. I actually sat down to write this post last Saturday, but I just couldn’t find the words for it. And ever since then I’ve been kind of in a daze. For the past few months CELTA has been a major focus of my life – the thing everything else was built around – and then last Saturday it was over. Suddenly I just don’t know what to do with myself. It feels like a break-up, like I need to reorganize my entire life. (Maybe some of you who’ve finished law school or gotten divorced or something can relate?) Don’t get me wrong, I have lots of things to do (my work contract isn’t over until next March), but right now I feel like I’m still coming down from a prolonged period of work and stress. What’s the lesson here? Be prepared for that moment when a major undertaking comes to an end. Either have something else in the works or just know that you won’t feel a sense of victory right away.

If enough people respond to this I’ll continue this list in another post (“5 More Things I Learned from CELTA”), but this is what I’ve got for now. Thanks for reading, and thank you especially to all the people who shared the CELTA experience with me.

As so often, I’ll leave the final word to Mr. Vince Lombardi -

Goth-nam Style: Pics from the Tim Burton Art Exhibit in Seoul

Last week, as most of you probably heard, our friendly neighbors to the north threatened to start a new Korean war, complete with an ominous promise to turn Seoul into a “sea of fire“. Like everyone else here in the South, I was so deeply disturbed by these threats that I….went to the Tim Burton art exhibition at the Seoul Museum of Art last Sunday.

I first heard about this exhibit way back in February when my friend Jenna posted several pics from her visit on Facebook. I’ve had plans to go ever since then, but being the busy procrastinator that I am, I waited until the very last day to attend.  Fortunately, the museum is walking distance from the building where I’m currently taking my CELTA course, so it was easy to walk over and buy my tickets after class last Saturday.

Among the highlights: I got to see Edward Scissorhands’s topiary deer (seen on the far left side of the pic above), along with one of Johnny Depp’s costumes. A lot of the models from The Nightmare Before Christmas were there too, including the collection of heads that were used to make Jack Skellington’s various facial expressions. Oh, and Sweeney Todd’s razors.

The whole thing was set up really well. Each Tim Burton movie had its own little area of the exhibit space – Mars Attacks here, Sleepy Hollow there, Ed Wood over this way. And on top of all that stuff, the entire first floor gallery was packed with images from Tim Burton’s sketchbooks and home movies. I wish I could have taken pics, but there were security guards all over the place reminding everyone that photography was a big no-no.

It’s worth noting that the lines to get into this damn thing were ridiculously long (by noon on Sunday the wait time exceeded four hours). So, a very special thanks to my friend Miriam for tipping me off that I needed to get there early. I arrived at 9:15 am and walked right in when they opened at 10.

Would I have been willing to wait four hours if I hadn’t gotten there early? It’s hard to say. I’ve long maintained that only about half of Tim Burton’s movies are actually any good.  In my estimation, Edward Scissorhands is his masterpiece. Following that, his short films (Vincent and Frankenweenie), Pee Wee’s Big Adventure, Beetlejuice, Ed Wood, the Batman movies (especially the second one), and more recently Sweeney Todd and Dark Shadows are the real standouts. Of course I love The Nightmare Before Christmas too, but – rarely acknowledged fact – Tim Burton didn’t actually direct that movie, so I don’t know if it really counts.

But, don’t let me get carried away with my film-snobby assessment of Tim Burton’s body of work here (though, needless to say, I will go into more detail if anyone wants me to). The simple long and short of it is that it was an excellent exhibit and I’m glad I had a chance to see it.

To close this off, I now give you Kevin Smith’s take on Tim Burton from An Evening with Kevin Smith. If you haven’t seen this, take 10 minutes out and watch it. I promise you, you won’t regret it. ***STRONG LANGUAGE WARNING***

More from me soon, dear readers.
Closing question: What’s your favorite Tim Burton movie?

True Korean Black Metal

If you browse through my list of favorite websites here on ye olde dying laptop you’ll find a link to Interpark, a great resource for finding out about upcoming concerts and plays here in the ROK. I visit Interpark at least once every couple of weeks to see what’s up, and sometime towards the end of February I noticed a concert listing for a band whose logo looked like this:
 Now, I’m not going to pretend that I’d ever heard of this band (Oathean) before, but I definitely know a metal logo when I see one. So I did a little research and found out that Oathean is actually one of Korea’s oldest and most established bands. In fact, the reason they were listed on Interpark is because they were playing their 15-year anniversary show. So, with money to burn and time to kill, I went.   

(Un)Holy crap, dear readers! I’ve been living in Korea for two years now. How did I not know there was an underground metal scene here? And not just a metal scene – an extreme metal scene.  

Of the five bands that played that night (Sunday, March 3rd), one was a melodic death metal/grindcore band (Remnants of the Fallen), one was a symphonic black metal band (Dark Mirror ov Tragedy, seen below – and yes, that’s a female violin player standing in the back) -

and Oathean was sort of a combination of the two. The other two bands were an awesome power metal act that sounded like a Korean version of Iron Maiden (Black Hole) and a Japanese deathcore band that sucked. Hey, four out of five ain’t bad.

All this time I just assumed Korea was all K-Pop and club music. I’ve never been so happy to be so wrong. \m/

Hopefully I can bring Kimchi along next time. You know how crazy he is for all those Norwegian “bark metal” bands: Dark Bone, Barkzum, EmPAWror, MahPen…
     

I’m sure he’ll dig the Korean scene as well. I know I like what I’ve seen so far.  

Anybody up for tagging along to a show?

My Gym Playlist for Monday (Mixed Cardio Day)

One of the many things I love about my new afternoon teaching schedule is that it gives me time to hit the gym on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday mornings. This past Saturday I even paid for an entire month’s membership instead of my usual pay-by-the-day routine (in any language: shit just got real).  Now, because I’m a huge dork I’ve made a gym playlist for each day of the week. Monday is my day for mixed cardio exercises. Here’s the playlist in case you’re looking for new music to throw into your workout.

Monday

Treadmill (30 – 35 minutes)

Walking at a brisk pace

(1) “Great Balls of Fire” by Jerry Lee Lewis. (It is my belief that any good treadmill walking song must have a nice blend of energy and groove. The Killer’s most famous track definitely fits the bill. Those first four chords let you know it’s time to get down to business.)

(2) “Space Truckin’” by Deep Purple. (In case you can’t tell from the title, this song is a pure 1970′s groove-rock extravaganza. Head-bobbing and shoulder swagging for days.)

Jogging or Running

(3) “Chick Habit” by April March. (The closing credits song from Quentin Tarantino’s Death Proof. This little adrenalin pumper sounds like a hybrid between a 1960′s pop song and a drive-in horror movie soundtrack. Fun and essential.)

Back to walking at a brisk pace

(4) “Twin Earth” by Monster Magnet. (This little trip through Psychedelic Stonerville is just what you need to bring you down from the rush of “Chick Habit.”)

(5) “I Heard It Through the Grapevine” by Marvin Gaye. (You can’t have a funky treadmill playlist without a Motown track. This song is so damn good it makes me wish I had a girl breaking my heart just so I could sing along and really mean it.)

Back to Running or Jogging

(6) “Running Free” by Iron Maiden. (I know metal is an acquired taste, but trust me you need this song – and you have to get the live version from A Real Dead One. It’s like Bruce Dickinson knows you’re running on the treadmill and wants to put words to it. When the audience chants “I’m running free” you’re like “Hey, what do you know? I’m running right now too!”)

Walking again, but slowing it down a bit

(7) “Wagon Wheel” by Old Crow Medicine Show. (Now I’d like to slow things down a little bit…This song…it’s just…well just listen to it. And then, once you know the words, just try not to sing along. This is one of the only songs that makes me miss Oxford.)  

(8) “Goin’ Down South” by R.L. Burnside. (Straight talk from a Mississippi blues legend. “More lies, more conversation, girl. It really don’t matter ’cause I’m not leaving you. / So you’re hanging with another man. You gotta get more creative, girl, I ain’t believin’ you…”)

(9) “1999” by Prince. (The energy starts to pick up again as you wrap up your time on the treadmill and head over to the elliptical machine.)

Elliptical Machine (15 minutes)

“I Drove All Night” by Roy Orbison. (What I really love about this song is the way the music so perfectly matches the lyrics. Roy’s singing about driving all night to get to his woman and, fittingly, the music sounds like it’s moving right along with him. It never slows down or stops for gas. Just hurries right along with purpose. Perfect to kick off your elliptical workout.)

“Old Time Rock and Roll” by Bob Seger and the Silver Bullet Band. (It’s the kind of song that was made for Karaoke Night – and nowhere near Seger’s best – but you have to admit, it’s got a lot of energy and it’s fun to listen to. Enjoy your workout. Get this song.)

“20th Century Boy” by T.Rex. (It’s unfortunate that people sometimes confuse glam rock with 1980′s hair metal. The actual glam rock scene came out of the UK and featured legitimate artists like Marc Bolan and David Bowie. The first time I heard this little groove was in a coffee shop off of Carrollton Avenue in New Orleans. I hate coffee shops, but that was one trip I’ve never regretted.)

“Gypsy” by Emperor. (Once again, I know metal is an acquired taste, but a good elliptical routine practically demands it. This is a cover of a Mercyful Fate song and the vocals are a little higher than I typically like, but it’ll help you find your second wind if you’re starting to slow down.)

Exercise Bike (15 Minutes) 

“Mouths of Babes” by the Smashing Pumpkins. (I try to take things easy on the exercise bike and just enjoy a nice ride after the up-and-down of the treadmill and the grind of the elliptical machine. The bike is quite possibly the only piece of equipment at the gym that lets you close your eyes and get lost for a while, and no band helps me do that better than the Smashing Pumpkins. If you’re reading my blog, you should already know this song…or did you not own The Aeroplane Flies High box set back in the day?)

“Dross” by the Smashing Pumpkins. (This is a solid rock track from Machina II – the “hidden” Smashing Pumpkins album that was released as an internet-only free download.)

“My Love is Winter” by the Smashing Pumpkins. (From their newest album Oceania. The guitar work/solo at the end will take older Pumpkins fans back.)

“Siva” by the Smashing Pumpkins. (You’ve gotta have at least one classic track in the mix. Might as well make it “Siva.”)

“Starz” by the Smashing Pumpkins. (Here’s the big finish to your bike routine. This track, in my opinion, was one of the standouts from Zeitgeist. I know a lot of people like to pull the “I only like their early stuff with the original lineup” bit, but this song has the same kind of push-and-pull as “Bullet With Butterfly Wings”: that feeling of building tension where you know something’s about to happen. And then it does. Play it loud. Most of the Zeitgeist songs sound awesome when they’re played live btw.)

So there it is. My Monday playlist. If I get a decent reaction from this post, I’ll share my other playlists as well.

Closing question: what do you exercise to?

Nobody Loves Me…or Do They?

When I woke up this morning and realized it was Valentines Day, I immediately logged into Facebook and posted the music video for Portishead’s “Sour Times“. I said it was my theme song for the day, mostly because of the simple, mournful lyric: ”Nobody loves me.”   

But I spoke too soon, dear readers.

Ashley brought me a Ghana bar. (Note the two Post-It notes across the front where she’d written a special Valentines Day message for me.)
 

Bell gave me a Ferrero Rocher. (And for once she didn’t hit me with a surprise tickle attack today!)

And dear sweet Cindy brought me a bag full of Hershey’s Kisses.

I guess I am loved after all.
Thank you, ladies. I can’t think of a better way to fall off the diet wagon. :)

And Just Like That, It’s Already February 2013.

Introduction

This is my first post since early November 2012, so let me start by saying Happy Thanksgiving, Merry Christmas, Happy New Year, and Happy Lunar New Year, dear readers. It’s been a long time since we’ve seen each other. Let’s take a few minutes and get caught up.

December, as some of you can probably guess, is always the craziest month of the year for us English teachers in Korea. On top of our normal work responsibilities, we have to plan our annual Christmas concert, conduct student evaluations, and write report cards. To add to the fun, I got sick towards the middle of the month and spent the vast majority of my Christmas break lying in bed. (I’ve been getting a lot of messages from friends back home lately, asking how they too might find a job in the ROK. They should take a lesson from this. Why did I wait until the Christmas break to take care of my illness? Because when you teach kindergarten in Korea you don’t have TIME to be sick.) Most of January was spent trying to recover from December. And now, just like that, it’s February. Time to catch a second wind and start putting some new plans into action. 

The New Plan 
So here’s the deal. The current school year winds down at the end of this month. I was hoping to move on to a high school or university position from here, but I need to have some form of TESOL certification to qualify for most of those jobs. So, I’ve applied for a CELTA course in Seoul (CELTA = Certificate in English Language Teaching to Adults).  My interview is on the 18th. With any luck, I’ll begin taking that course on Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday mornings in March.  Obviously that will cut into my kindergarten schedule, which is why I’ll now be working in my school’s afternoon elementary program instead. I’m really looking forward to this change of pace – especially having my Monday, Wednesday, and Friday mornings free. After a year of working overtime (12-13 hour days sometimes), I need some time to hit the gym, read, write, and basically just enjoy being in Korea. By this time next year I should be well on my way to a Korean university or a teaching job somewhere in the Middle East, but until then, at least I’m doing something I enjoy. :)  

And Speaking of New Plans…

Before I get too caught up in my autobiographical self-absorption, I want to extend a huge congratulations to my friends Matt and Liz Collins on the birth of their first son, Oliver “Ollie” Andrew Collins. Ollie is the first baby born to a member of the Group (a close circle of friends; we all graduated from BHS together), and in my mind he’ll always be able to pull rank based on that fact. Granted, Mike Lujan got the jump on everyone and has already produced four kids. But he only went to BHS for a year, so technically he falls outside the guidelines. (Sorry Mike!) Nicely done, Collinses.  

But Back to the Lecture at Hand…

     While there are no babies on the horizon for yours truly anytime soon, I do have a set of goals that I’m hoping to accomplish this year. Here they are in no particular order:

(1) Successfully complete the CELTA course – this one goes without saying.

(2) Build my savings - When I first came to Korea in 2011 I was focused on paying off my credit cards, which I did. Then last year I decided to buckle down and pay off some loans, which I also managed to do. These decisions were financially healthy (my credit score has gone up by 200 points) and this year I want to take them a step farther by putting myself on a monthly budget and building my savings. We’ll see how it goes.

(3) Spend more time with Kimchi – as I mentioned earlier, I’ve been extremely busy during the past year, especially over the past few months. My dog Kimchi has been a real trooper during this time, holding down the fort and keeping the apartment safe from burglars while I’m away. This year I want to repay the favor. I’ll be working shorter hours and trying to be a better dog owner. More walks. More fetch. Dog cafe’. The whole (ca)nine yards.

(4) Start playing guitar again – guitar fever is spreading among my co-workers, and it’s definitely got me in the mood to strap on an axe again. In my garage days, I was mostly just banging away on power chords. This year I’m actually gonna try to learn some scales.

(5) Start listening to new music - now, when I say ”new music” I don’t mean I want to start listening to the crap that’s on the radio. I just mean that I’ve basically been listening to the same songs, bands, and albums for quite a while now and it’s time to branch out a little. So far I’m doing really well on this resolution. Anyone have any suggestions? 

(6) Read something every day – it’s embarrassing how long it takes me to finish a book these days. This year I want to set aside a little reading time every day. On a related note: I will try not to buy any new books until I’ve already read the ones on my shelf. No promises, though. By the way, I’m only a few hours away from finishing John Irving’s Setting Free the Bears. It’s been an amazing read (I’ll blog about it when I’m finished) and I highly recommend it to anyone who enjoys good road trip stories.

(7) Write something every day – if you think it’s been a long time since I’ve updated this blog, you should see how long it’s been since I’ve tried to write a story or a script. Honestly, I just haven’t had the time or energy for it this year. And yeah, I know some people will say “real writers  find time to write,” but people who say those kinds of things are clearly ignorant about how the writing process works. “Time” for a writer (and I’m sure this is true for many other things as well) doesn’t mean spare minutes and hours. It means having time to block everything else out and approach your work with an intense single-minded focus. (That’s why they’re called writers retreats and not writers lunch breaks.) Finding that kind of time is nearly impossible when you’re working 12 hours a day. Hopefully this year will be different. I might also start a vlog.

(8)  Lose 35 Pounds -there seems to be a recurring pattern in my life. I spend one year getting into trouble and the next year getting out of it. In 2012 I gained a lot of work-related stress weight. In 2013 I’m going to melt it all off (already down 7.7 pounds).  

(9) Learn Korean – I wanted to work on this one last year, but I ended up being a lot busier than I’d anticipated. No time like the present, I guess.

(10) Start Mountain Climbing - last year I hiked up a mountain for the very first time. It wasn’t an easy trek (remember, I’m out of shape), but looking out over the city from the summit was completely exhilirating. I know now why all the holy books set important scenes on the tops of mountains (see also: Moses, Muhammad, etc.) If you come into contact with the divine, that’s probably where it’ll happen. My friends Tammy and Sarah have said they’ll help me in this endeavor. You’ll be hearing from me in another 12.3 pounds, ladies.

A Vote Before Parting

I think I’ve covered just about everything now, so I’ll go ahead and sign off. But first, let me pose a question to all of you. This year I’ll finally have the time and resources to take a summer vacation. Right now I’m looking at three options:

(1) Go to Berlin, see the sights, and attend the Wacken Open Air Festival.

(2) Go home, visit my family and friends. Bring Kimchi for his first trip to the States.

(3) Visit another country close by (Japan, Thailand, China, Vietnam, etc.)

What would you do if you were me? Let me know, dear readers.
Here’s hoping 2013 is kind to all of you.

15 Minutes of “Style”

Now that everybody and their grandmother is posting the video of Psy performing with MC Hammer at the American Music Awards -

I suppose I should finally say a few words concerning the cultural phenomenon that is “Gangnam Style”. 

My experience with this song began sometime in the middle of July, shortly after it was first posted on YouTube. The city buses where I live are all equipped with two flat-screen televisions, one in the front and one in the back.  Throughout the day these televisions play three or four videos on a loop — usually an advertisement for some upcoming concert or cultural event, an animated short, a commercial for an exotic tourist destination, and a few minutes of the latest hit K-Pop song. There’s no sound, so you basically have to treat the whole thing like eye candy.

Being tall, I like to sit in the very first seat so I can have more leg room. As Fate would have it, that’s exactly where one of the flatscreens is situated. So I literally had a front-row seat when “Gangnam Style” first went into circulation. Having seen my fair share of Korean music videos, I was immediately struck by the fact that this one had a sense of humor. (K Pop tends to be either very sexy or very teen romance, but not funny…It’s kind of like high school in a way. There are ten or twelve really good-looking people but only one class clown.)

Later that same morning my teaching partner Yuri came walking into the office with a big smile on her face, plopped her laptop down on my desk, and said, “Oh my god, you have to see this.”

“Oh yeah,” I said. “This is that video from the bus.”

Yeah. The next thing I knew, “that video from the bus” was being played everywhere I went. Street vendors in Itaewon started selling “Gangnam Style” socks. The old ladies who do aerobics in the park at night knew all the dance steps. And my students all started doing the horse dance every time they got up to sharpen their pencils.

Not long after, my co-workers and I started hearing weird rumors from back home. One person said their friend had heard “Gangnam Style” at a dance club in California. Another heard it while listening to his favorite hometown radio station online. The political blogs I frequent started running ridiculous articles that sought to explain what the song “is really all about.” And my friends in the States started decorating my Facebook wall with pictures like this one:

That was when it finally started to dawn on me that I was ground zero for something very special. (Well, almost ground zero…Gangnam is about 20-30 minutes from where I live.)Like most people, I had assumed that “Gangnam Style” was just a novelty song that would stay mostly limited to South Korean listeners. As of this writing, though, it has close to 800 million views on YouTube (arguably more “likes” than any other video) and could possibly hit the 1 billion mark by 2013. It’s not the first foreign-language song North America has ever fallen in love with, of course. For example, some of you may remember Jordy’s “Dur Dur D’etre Bebe“, Nena’s “99 Luftballoons“, and/or Richie Valens’s cover of the Spanish standard “La Bamba“. But to the best of my knowledge, “Gangnam Style” is the first crossover hit from Asia, and certainly the first one from Korea.

Speaking of Korea, can you find it on a map?

So congratulations to my adoptive country for giving us this neat little moment in time. The novelty will eventually wear off (and if you teach Korean kindergarteners, it wore off a loooooong time ago), but I’m looking into the future and imagining this song being one of those novelties we remember fondly (see also: “Ghostbusters“), not one of the ones that make us say “Ugh! What were we thinking?” (see also: “My Heart Will Go On” and “Macarena“).

Glad I was here for it.